“You are killing US with YOUR jealousy”

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By , August 31, 2020 7:34 pm

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To be accused and mistrusted by the one you love is a hardship and a definite pain that one cannot bear for a long time. They eventually either walk away or take a stand and call out to you, (the attacker) to please stop; to please listen to what you are saying and accusing them of.

Women,woman,esteem,self,confidence,jealous,issues,help,group,free,abuse,sexuality,beauty,ugly

So far I have enlightened the world with my thoughts on jealousy and self-esteem. I want to clear up any misunderstandings that may have some male people thinking that I am targeting only women here. Jealousy and self-esteem issues also can imprison men as well as women. No one is excused from real human emotions. Emotions know no face, color, size or gender. There are two victims here, not just one.

I also feel that I have neglected to reveal how the other party involved in a relationship that suffers from jealousy or self-esteem issues also suffers.

A relationship is a partnership. It is a commitment made between two people, in that we will stand by each other through thick and thin. Unfortunately, when it is a jealousy issue, both parties are effected. We tend to focus on the person that is trapped in the prison of worry, more than the other person that is caught in the line of fire, partly because we need to free that side first, then we can help heal the other.

Well I am now going to share that persons prison of hell as well.

To be accused and mistrusted by the one you love is a hardship and a definite pain that one cannot bear for a long time. They eventually either walk away or take a stand and call out to you, (the attacker) to please stop; to please listen to what you are saying and accusing them of.

Time after time they try so hard to reassure you that they do love you and that they are not interested nor lusting for anyone else. When they try to tell you that it is all in your mind, they risk getting attacked more for defense. It is no doubt a vicious circle. They become paranoid that no matter where they are, you are already convinced that they have betrayed you in some way. They wait for the shoe to drop. Some times it takes a few days, some times it drops immediately. Never the less they have to sit by and worry about when it will drop. They fear that this time they will not be able to say the right thing. They fear we will get even more depressed and irrational with what they say to us. They begin to feel, “damned if they do, and damned if they don`t”. I personally hate that feeling. To think that I myself would put someone in that position makes me want to run away faster than Forrest Gump.

The neglect you put on that person through your jealous insecurities is as real to them as your feelings of being trapped in your prison of doubt. There are many scenarios as to why jealousy rises up inside people, but for the innocent ones that really do not ever do anything to trigger that fear inside you, they are the innocent victims. People that have come to the point of identifying their issues and have began to deal with them, please remember the other person that is there with you. They too need special attention, because they have shared your fears and your pain. In a much different way, never the less, they still ache. Jealousy can destroy so many good things in ones lives. It can destroy our mate, through you, it kills the one thing that you love deeply. The worst part about it is, that you allow it. You must stop. Would you take a gun and shoot your mate? NOT!! So then why are you allowing this emotion to torture what is so dear to you? I repeat, as long as your mate is not responsible for your fears or if they have made amends and are trying to make things better, then please understand their pain of being mistrusted. When they see you in pain and they are being told it is because of them, they crumble. Your mate loves you as much as you love them, and to feel they are responsible for your trapped feelings eats them up inside. To see you smile and feel totally loved makes them feel good about themselves in that they are responsible for that smile. That is a good feeling all the way around.

Also be careful not to fall into that habit of being unhappy through jealous feelings. Understand where they are coming from. Are you using them as a reason to get attention? Again, a wrong kind of attention. If you cannot get the right attention you feel you are lacking, then talk to your partner. Do not let jealous emotions take over and confuse what you really are trying to say. Any weakness in your mind is a direct route for negative feelings to travel through. Once they get there, they work very quickly at bringing you down. So be aware of what exactly you are feeling.

I hope that I have at least opened up some thoughts in your minds as to what else is going on in a relationship that is plagued by jealousy. Both sides are equally being torchered and killed. We need to LIVE, LOVE & LAUGH more often with each other. Oh and lets not forget my favorite thing to do…HUGGGGGG!!!!

One thought from my heart to yours:

Say this outloud:

“I am always ready to risk.
I am always ready to learn.
I am always ready to test my strength, and so I put my worries aside and just live!”

Dorothy Lafrinere
Owner/Operator
Website- http://www.womensselfesteem.com
Weblog- http://www.justblogme.com/Dorothy
Forum- http://womenselfesteem.proboards29.com
email- dorothy@womensselfesteem.com

Baggage Handling – And Not The Kind You Take On Vacation!

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By , August 28, 2020 10:06 pm

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My friend Susan, a beautiful, intelligent and successful professional single, recently announced that her tumultuous 6-month relationship was over. “He’s got too much baggage and I don’t know how to handle it”, she explained over a skinny decaf latte at our weekly hangout session. So how much baggage is too much, and when do we hang out the “overloaded” sign?

baggage handling, relationships, relationship issues

My friend Susan, a beautiful, intelligent and successful professional single, recently announced that her tumultuous 6-month relationship was over.

“He’s got too much baggage and I don’t know how to handle it”, she explained over a skinny decaf latte at our weekly hangout session.

So how much baggage is too much, and when do we hang out the “overloaded” sign?

It’s a fact of life that any man over the age of 30 is going to bring some sort of baggage to a relationship. Heck, I know 20-year-olds with more baggage than the Orient Express!

And it follows that the older we get, the more likely it is that the baggage is going to exponentially increase — ex wives, children, stepchildren, in-laws, lifestyles or commitments, just to name a few. But it’s not about how much baggage he has, it’s more about how he (and we!) deal with it.

Kathryn Bigelow, behavioral scientist and director of the Burnett Behavioral Science Unit at Sydney University in Sydney, Australia says, “Baggage is merely a name for our collective past experiences. What we do with our history and how we manage it is a clear indication of how we will deal with current and future experiences.”

So back to my friend Susan. Her difficulty was in trying to deal with her partner’s obvious inability to let go of past relationships. According to her, this man wanted to remain friends with every woman he had ever gone out with. At least twice each week he would arrange to meet up with at least one of his ex’s for a coffee, or whatever. For Susan, her gripe was how to get his ex’s to exit – permanently.

According to Dr Bigelow, here is a list of ways to put the baggage down and get on with life:

*Take a good hard look at what you expect from a relationship and a partner. Then list the absolute essentials. The rest is baggage that needs to be discarded.

*From the list of essentials, try to imagine what it would be like to go without one of your “must-haves” for a day. How would you feel? Then try to imagine letting go for longer. The less demanding we are of ourselves and others, the less baggage we accumulate.

*Take a good hard look at who you are – yes, who you really are. Do an honest appraisal of your good and bad points and decide what you would like to change. Then imagine what it would be like if you could rid yourself of that trait for a day. Then try to imagine how much more space you would have in your life if you could let go of one of your negative qualities for good.

*Don’t take yourself too seriously. OK, you’re not 20 any more, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun. Think about the traits you have that annoy you, or other people, and try to find something funny about them. Creating a humorous side to a bad habit or trait can help diffuse it.

*Be your own best friend and don’t beat yourself up about things that happened in the past. The past is in the past, so there’s no point in worrying about things you can’t change.

*Let go of the anger, resentment or guilt that you may be holding on to. You’ll be amazed at how much lighter you’ll feel!

We all know how cumbersome it is travelling with excess baggage, and the costs it can incur, so the object is to travel through life with just the right amount of baggage to travel well, but happily.

Ending A Relationship – Important Things To Know

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By , August 27, 2020 12:51 pm

Every one of us has ended a relationship at one time or another. There are various reasons for ending a relationship, and there are important things to know before you end it. In addition to knowing why a relationship should be ended, you should also know what you should do before ending a relationship, while you are ending it, and after you end it. There is also help and support available to you throughout the process to make it as painless as possible.

Some reasons to end a relationship include lack of communication, lack of honesty, incompatible viewpoints and abuse. Communication is the cornerstone of a successful relationship, and without it, your bond together will be loosened. Honesty is another big one. If you or your partner are not honest with each other, how will you learn to trust each other when times get hard? If you do not trust your partner and see that you will continue not to trust him or her, then it might be time to consider ending the relationship.

When both of you have incompatible viewpoints, especially on certain significant topics like children, religion, spirituality and family values, then there needs to be some serious consideration as to whether or not you should continue the relationship. This is because down the road when those issues come up, your true side will come out and all the mess will hit the fan. It’s best to discuss it and nip it in the bud right now. Abuse is another big factor in ending a relationship. No person has the right to abuse his or her partner whether it is physically, emotionally or mentally. One of the biggest reasons for ending a relationship has to do with someone abusing the other person.

While you are ending your relationship, it is important to cut off all ties with that person such as friends, family members, co-workers, etc. This is to avoid coming back into the trap of being tempted to get back together again. Have some trusted people you can talk to in order to help you through the process. There is also help and support available to you to make the situation as painless as possible. After ending a relationship, continue to keep yourself busy and surround yourself with people you know and trust. The worst thing you can do is isolate yourself, so stay positive and reach out to your family and community.

Dating online without becoming pray for scammers

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By , August 26, 2020 12:53 am

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Online scammers mainly aim at people of different income levels, backgrounds and ages throughout the world. There is not any specific group which is more prone to become a prey of a scam. The practice of Scamming is successful because it looks like real.

Right Lover, Dating, Date Ideas, Love

Online scammers mainly aim at people of different income levels, backgrounds and ages throughout the world. There is not any specific group which is more prone to become a prey of a scam. The practice of Scamming is successful because it looks like real. It seems to fulfill your desire and needs. Scammers always attempt to mould you by inducing your nature to create the automatic reply they need. Here are few tips how to identify and avoid scammers at online dating sites.

1. Be cautious in the dating online scene. Use your emotional intelligence. If you have an ok profile without a personal photo on any dating website you will rarely ever get any answers from females. If you get lots of love letters from attractive good looking woman, you should think yourself: Would you be able to step into love with the profile you made that fast? What is there that could make her fall in love that quickly?

2. The first thing that creates an impression that the person who is communicating with you is a scammer is the mails. Scam letters are sent to a lot of people, are very neutrally, impersonally made for bulk use. The scam-emails can often be used for both the sexes, male and female. They will mention to you that they liked your pictures or description although you don’t have a self description or photo on internet. Scamming artist fall quickly in love, they will address you very quickly sweetheart, darling, baby or love honey.

3. If anyone is interested in you will get a number of questions detailed about your hobbies, life, before the individual decides to meet you. A scammer artist never asks you regarding your personal details. They will use to talk in general manner: How was your day? How is everyone at home? How are you today? Scamming letters are often a different thing from what you mention to them. If you discuss about particular your things, they will not even remember one week later and keep on saying that the season is ok.

4. If you try to keep in contact for few months and if your date shows great interest and pretends to be willing to spend his entire life with you, ask yourself why is he/she still searching for online love? People who love somebody, will quickly delete their own profile from the dating website, since it’s not a big issue to post a new addition if they become single again. If you view your lover still online, you can make a new contact id as a new user from a separate email address and check what reply you get. If your mate is willing to come to you and loves you like anything, you should not get him/her two times.

5. Never send any money for tickets and visas! Go to the person’s place or country and visit him/her there. Use well-established, trustworthy marriage or dating agencies for arranging and meeting trips.

Communication Is Vital For A Healthy Relationship

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By , August 23, 2020 3:54 am

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When people are told that they need to communicate more they often think that that is an open invitation to talk but there is a complete difference between talking and communicating.

Communicating is an art, and art of combining the ability to express your opinions and feelings in such a way as to ensure that the person or people you are talking to understand what you are trying to say with the ability to listen and understand another person’s point of view.

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Relationships,infidelity,save your marriage

When people are told that they need to communicate more they often think that that is an open invitation to talk but there is a complete difference between talking and communicating.

Communicating is an art, and art of combining the ability to express your opinions and feelings in such a way as to ensure that the person or people you are talking to understand what you are trying to say with the ability to listen and understand another person’s point of view.

The number of times I have sat in a room, often in meetings and at conferences and I’ve just watched and listened to what is going on around me. It is totally fascinating when whole groups of people have no ability to listen to their colleagues, partners or friends and therefore cannot understand or comprehend any opinion other than their own.

What could have been covered in five minutes or learned in half an hour often takes hours or days just because people refuse to sit back, listen and understand.

Over the years it’s amazing the number of times people are provided with information that, if they acted upon, could totally alter a relationship, career or the success of a business. But, because the sheer lack of peoples ability to listen to and think through another persons point of view unique opportunities pass them by.

Relationships are no different to the work environment other than there are, usually, just two of you. Often, what could be a marriage made in heaven is destroyed by the sheer inability to communicate. The most successful relationships, be it business or personnel are those whereby both parties have strong verbal and listening skills.

Many relationship problems begin with poor communication. Couples often feel that their partner should know what they are thinking and how they feel so do not communicate and then wonder why they feel neglected and under valued.

How many people decide not to tell their partner something just because they don’t know how to say it and then the problem just eats away at the relationship until there is no relationship left? What a waste, just the sheer ability to share a problem can make what seemed to be an insurmountable issue a tiny little blip on a large horizon.

So whenever you feel stressed or don’t know what to do don’t just bottle it up, talk about it, seek advice and listen to the answer. Don’t keep quiet when you know in your heart a problem has to be aired and don’t put off until tomorrow what has to be sorted today. Tomorrow never comes!!

It is how you say something that will ruin a relationship and not what you have to say. The wrong way is just to blurt out something that you know will aggravate or distress your partner. The last thing you want is for them to get defensive, storm off or burst into floods of tears. You want the person you are trying to communicate with to be open and perceptive and in order to be able to achieve this, your timing and approach has to be right.

Every individual is different what will work with one person won’t necessarily work with another and with some people all you can do is sew the seed and then let them walk away and work it out for themselves.

One person I know never actually listens to anyone. She is one of those people who is always right no matter what, hasn’t a clue about being a team player and operates within a zero tolerance zone. Traditional approaches and method of reasoning just don’t work and alls you can do is plant the seed of thought which eventually develops into her, own acceptable idea.

Given peoples individuality you need to learn what, is the right approach for you and your partner. Make sure that you never start a discussion if you don’t have time to finish it, don’t insist on a debate when one of you is off out to work, dealing with the kids or just relaxing in front of their favourite TV programme. If the timing seems to be never right ask the question ‘when would it be a good time for us to just sit down and talk?? Whatever you do, do not let yourself appear agitated either in what you say or how you say it. Body language can just as easily put your partner on the defensive as what you say to them. Even if your partner is vying for a fight just don’t react.

Remember, the first golden rule, approaching defensive with defensive is a sure way to failure.

One of the key ways to improve communication is to develop strong listening skills. Couples often fail to listen to what their partner has to say, interrupt and give the impression that no matter what is said they won’t change their mind. One trick to ensure that you have listened and you do understand is to repeat what you have heard. This will demonstrate that you have listened to what was said and by repeating it back you have the opportunity to comprehend and understand.

How often do we try and work through a problem and it’s only at the point we are explaining the issue to someone else does the magic light bulb switch on which enables us to come up with the answer.

If you are taking an exam would you expect to know everything just by being told it once? For most people I would say not. We have to work at it and work at it hard.

No one ever said marriage would be easy it’s just another lesson we have to learn as we experience life but if you want to save your marriage and make it even more special than it was before then there is very little to stop you.

Relationship problems can lay heavy on your mind, become a burden and what was originally a small issue can develop into an insurmountable mountain.

If you begin to feel that marital issues are beginning to weigh heavily on your mind, take a break and do something you enjoy and preferably with your partner. If you can refocus your attention of the better things in life, day to day issues always seem that much smaller. Spending a little time together and enjoying each other’s company could enable you and your partner to recapture some of the feelings that have been lost through constant arguing and help you regain a positive perspective on your relationship.

Just one last word of advice, when you are feeling down and feel you no longer want to save your marriage just remember that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

If you believe you have financial issues now what do you think it will be like when you split your assets, if you feel you don’t have time to do things what will it be like when you are on your own or worse a single parent and if you feel lonely now how will you feel when every time you walk in your front door all’s you have is your own company. Now none of these thoughts have been aired to encourage you to stay in a bad relationship but rather to make you consider whether or not yours is as bad as you think.

You are the master of your own destiny and if you want to turn a bad marriage around you have the power at your fingertips.

Teenage Online Dating – Tips To Keep In Mind

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By , August 20, 2020 11:47 pm

In the world of teenage online dating, there are many things to keep in mind, despite the fact that there might not be any physical contact going on. There are still a lot of factors involved in the teen’s psychological development, especially when it comes to emotional interactions online. Some things you can do to encourage a positive teenage online dating experience are to talk to your teen about their self worth, tell them why you are being strict with their online activities, control which website they go to , and monitor their chats.

The first thing to keep in mind about teenage online dating and teenage dating in general is to talk to your teen about his or her self worth. This has to happen before they get online and while they are online as well. Sometimes teens get online because they are to shy to hang out with their friends. Sometimes this can be a sign of a bigger problem having to do with identity. When you go online, you have the ability to be someone who you are not. You can create a fake name for yourself and sometimes upload pictures of people other than you. The flip side of this is that even if your teen is totally normal, there is a chance that the person they are talking to is not who they say they are. They could instead be a grown forty something year old child molester. This is why it is important to be vigilant about what websites your teens visit and about what they are saying in their chat sessions.

Tell your teen the reasons why you are being strict about their teenage online dating. They will respect you more for it. If they come across some online drama, which happens quite often online, then you can nip it in the bud quickly. A common problem in online dating is cyber bullying. Sometimes when someone knows your teen is dating another person, they will post horrible things on their Facebook or Twitter wall, discouraging or putting down the teen. Activate the appropriate security settings for your teen to block any potential cyber bullies and control which websites they go to. Put monitors on YouTube channels and record their chat logs. Better yet, have your teen get out to meet people physically. That will help them gain confidence about their social skills instead of staring at a computer screen all day long.

Dating, Marriage, Love, and Relationship Advice: The Dance of Commitment and Your Secret Passion Signature!

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By , August 20, 2020 6:53 am

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If you are single, dating, or trying to get to “I DO?and spend too much time hurting and not enough time loving this may be the most important love relationship advice you could ever receive. Did you know that some people just don’t let themselves have love? Some are eaten alive with the “fear of commitment.?Some can’t let themselves take the risk or feel vulnerable so they string you along in a dating relationship. Some people don’t love themselves enough to value you if you love them. Here’s how to spot the signs of a hopeless case, using little known relationship tips.

Dating, online dating, adult dating, dating advice, single dating, dating advice, Relationship, love relationship, love relationship advice, relationship advice, relationship help, relationship problem

If you are single, dating, or trying to get to “I DO?and spend too much time hurting and not enough time loving this may be the most important love relationship advice you could ever receive. Did you know that some people just don’t let themselves have love? Some are eaten alive with the “fear of commitment.?Some can’t let themselves take the risk or feel vulnerable so they string you along in a dating relationship. Some people don’t love themselves enough to value you if you love them. Here’s how to spot the signs of a hopeless case, using little known relationship tips.

The truth is that unless a soul is willing to be involved with you, there is no hope whatsoever for a love relationship. No set of skills you learn from any book, seminar, or TV program can create a breakthrough when the other does not choose it. Of course, this can be terribly frustrating for you if you are dating or married and a willing partner. It’s painful, a lot like hitting your head against the wall. Nonetheless, all too often we do not listen when we are told no, because we believe there must be something more we can do to fix the situation so that our desires prevail. Each of us wants what we want when we want it, especially when it comes to love relationship, so we tend to ignore the inevitable and keep on trying. I’ve done this myself. I may be a therapist, but I am a woman first and I learned these lessons through painful firsthand experience.

In a dating relationship, a man who says, “This relationship doesn’t fit into my 20-year projection,” or a woman who tells you, “I leave everybody with whom I get involved,” is telling you that he or she is not available. And that’s the truth. Most likely this person has chosen this dating relationship with its current limitations because it didn’t have long-term potential in his or her mind. It doesn’t matter how great the sex is, how attractively you dress, or how well you get along, the day will come when you will hit a nasty wall of resistance. You may even hit the wall right after you attain an amazing state of ecstatic union. Then, out of the blue, everything will come to a screeching halt. When suddenly your love interest informs you, “It’s over,” it’s super important to listen to what is being said to you and heed the message. Otherwise you are in for deeper disappointment.

Ironically dating that leads to a true love relationship is terrifying to the hidden part of us that’s responsible for our safety and survival. If we love deeply and surrender to love, fear naturally arises. Opening up to another being tends to bring up old wounds from the past, especially childhood. The survival system can be stronger than the human heart. Its only interest is in protecting us from getting hurt by anyone or anything. For some of us, the possibility of establishing a profound connection poses perhaps the biggest threat. The fear of commitment often masks a deeper issue. You may feel “not good enough,” “engulfed,” “not perfect,” and so on. The fire of passion is literally too hot for many people to handle, so they run away. Without making the soul choice to hang in there and face the fire, our desired connections don’t stand a chance.

There are love relationship tips you can use to let you know that you have snagged someone afraid of connection. See if these sound familiar:

1. After the sexual excitement has died down a bit your lover becomes elusive.
2. Your love interest starts avoiding opportunities to get together, and when you mention it you are called a “complainer.”
3. Any mention on your part of moving into more commitment is met with evasion, “Do what you need to do for yourself. Don’t worry about me.”
4. Your partner develops a roving eye. Sitting at a dinner table you see your beloved watching everyone that passes.
5. The sexual interest dies between you. You express a desire for more affection and are told that you are “too pushy.”

It doesn’t matter what techniques you use in a love relationship. Unless there is an awakening of consciousness and a desire to increase the level of intimacy, there cannot be a breakthrough. In my therapeutic practice I have watched women spend ten years with men who were terrified of being abandoned but were also terrified of commitment. When push comes to shove this type of man chooses his freedom over the woman. He is often too concerned with what he could miss out on later to commit to today.

In my book, The Passion Principle: Discover Your Personal Passion Signature and the Secrets to Deeper Relationships in Love, Life and Work, I identify 5 signature styles of relating. Each has a healthy balanced, loving aspect, which makes for great relationships and a wounded side, which shows up as the inability to love or commit for one reason or another. They are the Warrior/Conqueror, Lover/Vamp, Creator/Martyr, Prophet/Perfectionist, and Visionary/Perfectionist. To create a breakthrough in receiving the love you want or commit to the love you have, you must step into the balanced healthy aspect of your signature.

In romantic relationships the Warrior is committed, sexy and loyal. The Conqueror works so many hours s/he is not available for commitment. The Lover is wonderful with commitment and intimacy. The Vamp can be desperately needy and make you want to run from commitment. The Creator is fantastic at commitment. The Martyr feels trapped in intimate relationships and runs at the first sign of commitment. The Prophet is a blissfully connected lover. The Escapist is a Houdini who will run from you at the first sign of commitment. The Visionary is positive, high energy and a great mate. The Perfectionist is disappointed by anyone who turns up in the flesh because they are searching for the perfect mate.

The wounded aspects of the “passion signatures?can get in the way of deepening intimacy and cause you to waste precious time. I have seen men and women spend 30 years trying to find Mr. or Ms. Right, and no one was ever good enough. If this type is your partner, you won’t be good enough either.

You can beg a workaholic Conqueror to come home and put your relationship first for decades, only to bury this type of mate before the request is honored. You can also consume five years trying to get a Martyr to join you in a grounded, forward-moving relationship to no avail, and forfeit just as many years of effort trying to establish a significant relationship with a Vamp who is only attracted to the unavailable. Relationships can be used as vessels for growth and healing, but only between willing partners.

A 45-year-old Martyr grew up under the domination of an angry, controlling mother. As an adult, he continued waging battle against his mother by never committing to one woman. In a series of monogamous relationships, he provoked a long stream of women to become hostile and demanding, just like his mother, until the day came when each one could not stand any more and left him in disgust. What he didn’t realize was that his past was ruling his life and that love would elude him forever unless he dealt with his wounds. His latest girlfriend, a woman who wanted to understand her patterns, brought him to my office. She asked me to help her decide whether or not to stay in it, or break it off.

The man was the eternal “nice guy” who would do anything for his woman, except commit. Each of his previous girlfriends only knew this side of him, because he was a chameleon. His defiance of her was never put in her face. It was subtle, insidious, behind-the-back stuff, nothing she could put her finger on. He seemed to be there, in the dating relationship, except he wasn’t really there. He told his new love interest that he was keeping his connections with the other women because he didn’t like to hurt people. He insisted that he wasn’t stringing anyone along . . . it was just that he had never found the one woman to whom he could commit. His fears were sabotaging the relationship.

My client who was the wounded Lover/Vamp had been replaying a traumatic childhood scene of her own with the boyfriend. In relationship with him, she basically was trying to get her abandoning father not to leave. Her dad had walked out on her family when she was a small child, never to be seen again. Both she and her boyfriend were full-grown adults, yet when it came to love they were hopelessly locked in a painful cycle of tug of war. She was sabotaging her happiness by trying to persuade an unavailable man to love her.

Remember: There are no bad guys here. Sometimes we’re ready for things and sometimes we are not. A sign that you are personally unready is that you continue dating people who are also not available when you check below the surface. Or if they are available, you “make” them not good enough, or tell yourself, “Not now.” If you are on the receiving end of a message of reluctance, hang in there for a little while in case your love interest becomes more comfortable. Seek help in processing your feelings if you must. But if you find your self-esteem draining from you while you wait, or you feel less and less valued by your mate, it is time to “cut bait” (break up), toss “the fish” (your partner) back into the sea, and walk away.

There are more easy-to-apply love relationship tips and tools you can use to create commitment in what looks like hopeless cases. In my book, The Passion Principle: Discover Your Passion Signature and the Secrets to Deeper Relationships in Love, Life and Work, you will find lots more to help you have the love relationship you deserve.

Here’s one final thought. If you are in a loving relationship, it is vital that managing the relationship and growing in the relationship become your two highest priorities. You must be honest and diligent, take responsibility for your own energy, feelings, thoughts, and defenses, and try to understand your impact on your partner. This last item matters most when things are going wrong or you want to deepen your connection. These are keys to unleashing romantic passion.

Excerpt from The Passion Principle, Copyright Donna LeBlanc 2006

Bring On The Love With Aromatherapy Candles

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By , August 17, 2020 10:19 am

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When you are trying to incite a romantic mood you need to have some good quality aromatherapy candles to arm yourself with. These aromatherapy candles will be what makes or breaks your romantic evening. You need to take special care when choosing the aromatherapy candles that you want to use as well. There is nothing like a terrible smell to turn someone off and nothing like a great one to turn them on. The trick is to know which is which. Remember that what smells good to yo…

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When you are trying to incite a romantic mood you need to have some good quality aromatherapy candles to arm yourself with. These aromatherapy candles will be what makes or breaks your romantic evening. You need to take special care when choosing the aromatherapy candles that you want to use as well. There is nothing like a terrible smell to turn someone off and nothing like a great one to turn them on. The trick is to know which is which. Remember that what smells good to you may not smell good to your partner.

When you are in the planning stages of your special night you need to find out what kinds of smells will thrill your partner. Men often respond well to vanilla. Some experts even claim that vanilla scents are a male aphrodisiac. So if your partner is a mail then you may want to get yourself some great vanilla aromatherapy candles. These will get him in the mood right as he walks in the door.

What makes vanilla such a good choice of aromatherapy candles is that it appeals to almost anyone, both men and women. Very few people dislike vanilla aromatherapy candles and they will not take away from anyone appetite. If you have some of these aromatherapy candles burning they will even make your dinner taste better. They put people in such a good mood and they make them hungry as well.

You can place your aromatherapy candles all over the house, but only in the rooms that you plan on spending some time in. You may want to mix in your aromatherapy candles with other non scented candles. If you have too many aromatherapy candles around the scent can become overwhelming and that is never good. You want your scented rooms to be subtle and stimulating. So one or two aromatherapy candles in a room at one time is a good idea.

You should also take care with the aromatherapy candles that you choose. If you want to mix the candle scents you need to watch carefully. Some scents will not mix together well at all. Before you have your special and romantic evening you need to test the smells together to see if they blend well. This is vitally important to your entire evening.

You may want to have your candles on the actual dinner table be regular non scented candles. Having aromatherapy candles on the table is probably not a very good idea as it can interfere with the flavors of the dinner itself. So keep the aromatherapy candles away from the dinner table and your dinner will be a bigger hit.

You can have aromatherapy candles in the bedroom as well but do not light these before you get in that room. You should never leave candles unattended for too long, especially if you have pets. They could knock them over and start a fire. Proper aromatherapy candle safety is necessary at all times.

A Guys’s Painless Guide To Engagement, Pt.1

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By , August 14, 2020 1:12 pm

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So you’ve finally gone and done it. You proposed. And surprise…she actually said yes!

After you pick yourself off the floor from from sheer disbelief after her actually saying yes, you suddenly realize that a whole bunch of things have been set in motion. Your beloved is now in her own world, and she is in a planning frenzy. All you can do is look with slack-jawed amazement as your future wife talks to friends, picks flowers, reads countless books, and engages herself in t…

wedding jewelry, wedding ring, engagement, chocolates, wedding favors,

So you’ve finally gone and done it. You proposed. And surprise…she actually said yes!

After you pick yourself off the floor from from sheer disbelief after her actually saying yes, you suddenly realize that a whole bunch of things have been set in motion. Your beloved is now in her own world, and she is in a planning frenzy. All you can do is look with slack-jawed amazement as your future wife talks to friends, picks flowers, reads countless books, and engages herself in the duties of being an engaged woman.

I know all about it. It’s happened to me twice. So besides staying out of the way (it is HER day after all, don’t forget that), what do YOU do as a future groom? Where do you begin? What’s the first step? What things in planning this wedding should the both of you do equally?

Let me share a few quick thought about that from a groom’s perspective. After all, even though this is a wedding for you both.

There’s not much we as guys really care about with weddings, except making the bride happy. Outside of that, we’re not really concerned with much else. I really didn’t care if the flowers were pink or green, and I didn’t have a “vibe” about who should shoot the pictures. But there are siome things, when it comes

One thing that I would suggest is that you nail down your tuxedo style. Do it quick, before your beloved gets her inset ideas about color and bridesmaid’s dresses. If you don’t, you’ll be finding a tux to match her style, not your own. At the very least, by choosing the tux first, she’ll have to consider your style. And you REALLY don’t want to wear a PINK cummerbund, do you?

Another thing: Get a GOOD ring. You’ll save money in the long run, I promise you. Wedding-Day-Planner.com has a wide selection of wedding rings in different sizes, styles and price ranges. I’ll say it again, GET A GOOD RING. There’s nothing worse that paying money for a ring, then having a diamond fall out because the setting wasn’t done right.

You’ll be out of that money, as feel like a idiot for flushing money down the drain. I’ll say it for the third time, because men and hard of hearing: GET A GOOD RING.

Accessorize for less. Yes, guys, there is more to this that renting a tux. Once again, I suggest Wedding-Day-Planner.com. They have tons of items, over 12,000 of them, from rings to ties to chocolates. They operate in conjunction with Amazon.com, so the service is great, and you can most stuff in 1-2 days. You can’t beat that, and it’s better than traveling from one wedding store to another. Shopping’s painful enough for us guys.

Check out the store, you’ll probably get some cool ideas that she’ll like.

And I’m not just the owner, I’m a client.

And one last thing, guys: relax. The hard part is over, you’ve asked the woman that makes your heart jump out of your chest to say yes to you, and she has. Sure, the preparation may drive you nuts at times, but remember, it’s HER day. And it’s all about making her happy. Because when Mama’s happy, everyone else is happy. Including you.

Welcome to marriage, guys. It’s really good, I promise. You don’t have to plan everything, that’s what she does. But when you have your say, it makes it clear that you’re in this with her. And that you’re in it for life. And that, it the end is all she really wants.

Restoring Broken Relationships By Going Back To The Basics

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By , August 14, 2020 11:10 am

With social networking sites becoming more and more popular, people are now able to communicate constantly with their loved ones and partners. Time and distance are irrelevant here because the worldwide web allows you to send a message with just a click of your mouse.
At first glance, you think this is a very great idea. You simply have to sign up with a site, get in touch with everyone in your lives, and post comments on your wall, but when it comes to relationships, the old-fashioned methods are still so much better. Facebook and Twitter might work for long-distance relationships, but when you live in the same city as your partner, then you might have to rethink about connecting via the net.

The Downside of Technology

The problem with technology is that things have become less personal. Hence, this could also cause the relationship to break down and fall apart. Just know that you should never air your dirty linen in public. Some people have obviously taken this belief for granted. They write what they feel on their walls, badmouth people they know, or simply announce to everyone how much they love their partner. Sure, it can be romantic, but then again, some things are better left private.

Bring on the romance when you’re together. In all honesty, most of your friends don’t really want to listen to your baby-talk. And when some of them do react, you don’t take this too well. You have to realize that once you put your emotions on the wall, this is subject to public opinion. So, if you’re not ready to be judged, then you better be careful with your statuses.

Going Back to Basics

Restore your relationship by making things special. Share experiences only with him. Remember, what you say to your partner should stay with just him. When love is involved, whatever comes out of your mouth has a big impact.

So, whenever you have a fight, think twice before you tell everyone else that you’re having issues. It’s better to talk directly and hash out your issues. This means that when emotions are running high, it’s time to take a step back and think about what you say or do. Make decisions when you’ve cooled off. Plus, it’s always nice to throw in a bit of mystery in your relationship. Loving someone is such a personal thing.

Love and Romance

When it comes to love, you also have to realize that a little bit of effort goes a long way. You have to make your partner feel that you’re willing to do something extra just to show them how much you care for them. A little ‘love you’ on the wall may win you some extra points, but a letter or time alone is worth so much more.

The fires of intimacy last longer when there’s actual contact. Plus, think about why you’re in a relationship in the first place. It’s because you want the physical presence of someone when you’re in both the highest and lowest points in your life. The only opinion that matters is right now and is from your other half.

So, let social networking sites be just for your friends from far away and live your real life with your partner and the people that you’re close to. To rekindle the love in your relationship, it’s better to go back to the basics.

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